The Torch Report
The Torch Report
TR 597 - On the Great Debate, Crackhead Convictions, & Other Headline News
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TR 597 - On the Great Debate, Crackhead Convictions, & Other Headline News

This is an honest attempt to make light of the unimaginable madness.

Let's set the record straight.

Any serious debate between Joe Biden and Donald Trump would be an absolute blowout. There is no way, not a snowball’s chance in hell, that the Sock Puppet would stand a chance squaring off with The Don. Regardless, suggesting that this debate would in any way be detrimental to Donald Trump is political theater at its finest.

Which brings us to the headlines at Drudge Report this morning:

No one in their right mind believes that Joe Biden is betting on a big debate shake up, wherein he stomps the piss out of Donald Trump, and Trump suffers in the polls because of it. I seriously doubt anyone on his own team he even believes this nonsense.

By the way, did you notice the lobes?

I just never get tired of that whole attached-to-unattached trick.

At any rate… that trick is getting old, and I’m just getting started. There’s nothing quite like a grotesque degree of gaslighting to get you going in the morning!

I’d like to refrain from deeper level analysis today, in order to give you an entertaining take on today’s headline news. It is absolutely outrageous what’s happening in the world, and that debate between Trump and Biden is really just setting the stage.

Today we learned that Boeing has undertaken an urgent mission, after 108 years of operation, to train thousands of rookies to safely build airplanes. This novel concept was undoubtedly stimulated by the ongoing investigations into repeated mechanical failures, breaches of safety protocols, and the spate of mysterious deaths that have cropped up among recent whistleblowers, indicating that the more seasoned employees were not properly trained.

Elsewhere in the news, voting technology company Smartmatic has subpoenaed four Fox News board members for exposing the company’s role in perpetrating massive voter fraud in the 2020 election. Smartmatic, which received an exclusive award from Microsoft back in 2000, was used by Marxists to steal the Venezuelan election in 2004, admitted their system was able to create “at least one million” phantom votes in 2017, started conspiring with Facebook and the United Nations during the mid-terms of 2018, was banned from the Philippines for stealing elections in 2022THAT “voting technology” company—is now suing Fox’s board members for allowing Fox News to “spread disinformation about the 2020 election.”

Side note: anyone who still believes our elections are “safe and secure” is a moron.

Meanwhile, we have unhinged leftist attorney George Conway telling The Daily Show that “we are going to have to deprogram” Trump supports at some point after the election. This follows heels Hillary “Cankles” Clinton calling for the “formal deprogramming” of MAGA “cult members” on CNN last October, and other liberal attorneys calling for “re-education camps” to end the MAGA nightmare.

Don’t think for a second that they’re just because they’re crazy, these people aren't serious.  

Today we also find out that the US government is funding an NGO in Ukraine—ironically named the “Data Journalism Agency”—that recently put out an enemies list that includes many high profile U.S. citizens, elected representatives, and conservative news outlets. Essentially, the globalist NGO is using American tax dollars to smear anyone opposed to never ending wars, the Biden regime, or the Left in general, as pushers of Russian propaganda.

No surprise there. Nothing to see here. Moving on.

Four Americans got stabbed in China—which I’m sure you heard about, because that’s the biggest, most important thing happening in the world today. That’s right up there with Hunter Biden being found guilty on all counts of violating federal law when, as a convicted crackhead, he purchased a gun back in 2018, or with the senior Senile Biden apparently glitching and freezing as he attempted to dance the day away at a ridiculous Juneteenth event.

Are you not entertained?

How about this ugly mug:


Apparently, Nancy Pelosi is now claiming she takes responsibility for the lack of law enforcement present when the “mob” of so-called “violent insurrectionists” stormed the Capitol on January 6, 2021. This is strange, of course, given that desperate requests for backup were denied at least six times (according to the former Capital Police Chief)—and the fact that this reality has been vehemently denied and obfuscated for over three years.

Even today, if one were to search for what happened that fateful day, the algorithms are hard at work concealing the truth and feeding the public full of lies, courtesy of the Trusted News Initiative’s arm of inbred fact-checkers:

As always, this is a choose-your-own-reality sort of adventure. It can be virtually guaranteed that no self-respecting liberal is going to be willing to look at the hard facts that shatter their carefully crafted, exceptionally delicate illusions. If there was ever any doubt that Pelosi was lying through her teeth under oath, which there shouldn’t be, but if there was, today’s testimony should finally put that to rest.

Regardless, just to make sure the record is perfectly clear here, those of us living in Realville have known since the day that it happened that the entire thing was orchestrated by insiders. Thus, while the liberal media has relentlessly attempted to deny reality, the truth about J6 has been known far and wide throughout the heartland.

For anyone still needing proof to make sense of the madness of that day, consider these sources as starting points for further illumination:

In reality, what happened on J6, and what has transpired since that day, up to and including the ongoing daily arrests of American patriots that is still happening right now, is absolutely disgusting. It’s sickening.

It’s wrong on every imaginable level.

And yet… what? What the hell are you going to do about it, peasant?

What are you going to do about the sham show trials, the repeated political persecutions, the blatant judicial warfare, and the direct election interference by our very own government? What has become painfully obvious, is that the powers that be believe you will do nothing.

They believe that they can keep you pacified with political circus, with entertainment and distraction, with having to work 60 hours a week just to make ends meet, buy groceries, and pay for gas, all at the exorbitant prices being driven by historically high inflation. The question is: are they right?

Are we really just hackable animals? Have we been so dumbed-down and domesticated that we have forgotten the lessons of history? Has Thomas Jefferson’s Spirit of Resistance been replaced by a laissez-faire sense of entitlement and apathy?



The very thought of it is nearly unbearable.

But alas, this is supposed to be an entertaining take on the today’s headline news, so let’s get back to the rat killing. Where were we?

Ah yes, that’s right, apparently some top Democrats are beginning to mutter behind closed doors about Biden’s abysmal poll numbers. One of the Left’s most esteemed self-righteous, perennially inaccurate pollsters, Nate Silver, has said the quiet part out loud: President Biden’s approval ratings are so low that it may be time for him to reconsider seeking re-election in November.

It would be a strange turn of events, wouldn’t it? Can you imagine if Joe Biden pardoned his crackhead son, then suddenly fell ill and decided to step down as president and back out of the race with less than six months before the presidential election?

At this point it certainly seems as if anything is possible, and stranger things have happened, so I would not put it past his handlers to try to pull a stunt of such epic proportion—but never mind all of that. Did you hear that Trump is now promising to end taxes on tips, as one of the first things he does if he gets reelected?

Apparently, Biden voters are swooning in droves!

Talk about having a finger on the pulse of the people!!

This all comes as more and more people are waking up to the fact that WWIII has already begun, Elon Musk continues to advance protections for free speech, the Teamsters Union boss is officially asking for a speaking slot at the Republican National Convention, and all the slew of recent “far-right victories” in European elections have progressives running around like the hair is on fire, screeching about how this may imperil support for Ukraine.

It’s a clown world.

And yet, life is still good. The world keeps turning. Hug your loved ones. Never let them steal your joy. Steele your resolve. We’ve got hard choices and work to do.

Take a deep breath. Relax. Settle the mind.

We’ve got a long way to go to get out of this mess.

Come to peace with that fact. Let that peace guide you through the storm. The headlines will swirl, but the truth shall prevail. We will win. We have to.

RESIST WE MUST!

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The Torch Report
The Torch Report
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